April 2018 – Winta Solstice

… was what I was told as soon as she knew that I wasn’t religious. “Huh,” I thought.

It seems like a really nice and considerate statement, but then it had seems somewhat closed and short. Like the topic was over. It had bothered me.

You know what? I’ll pray for you, and that the lord will find you and lead you to a better place.

Wasn’t that statement a little passive aggressive?

Religion and I

Since little, my parents had given me a strict set of guidelines of things I can and can’t do, must and mustn’t do via religion. I was told to sit in a meditation posture and pray, without really knowing what it does.

It turns out, I was supposed to see my “master” in my inner conscience. If we pray and meditate a lot, with enough focus, we would be able to see her. I suppose it is similar to Jesus or Allah appearing in your thoughts when you ask for help.

My family’s religion, The Quan Yin Method, developed by the Supreme Ching Hai, is similar to Buddhism. Raised with this religion, I was vegetarian all my life. I meditated for most of my childhood, not knowing what I was doing. I was told to chant my “master’s” name before I slept so that I would be blessed. If I did everything right, I would see her in my inner thoughts.

Well, hard as I tried, I never saw her.

I felt like I was doing something wrong. Like I wasn’t good enough. How come everyone else seems to be on the right path, but I couldn’t see it?

Doubts, Questions, and Insecurities

As a child I was really confused, but I was scared of asking for fear of adults scolding me. I was also scared of being slow and that everyone would know that I’m too shallow to understand the depths of my master’s teachings.

I felt like I was just sitting there, waiting an eternity for the 30 minutes to end so I could go eat and play.

When we lived in the Philippines, Christianity was the dominant religion. I didn’t participate in Bible study, so I had a lot of time to myself while my friends hung out and talked about Christ.

I enjoyed reading stories about Christ. How God created the world. The story of Adam and Eve. The three kings and baby Jesus. Christmas was also my favorite holiday!

Then, I was also conscious of Buddhism, from books and TV shows, there were lots of fun lessons to learn. Buddhism taught me the importance to question everything. I needed to be conscious of my way of living.

If I want to throw fire at someone, my hand would be burnt first.

The more people I meet, the more my mind opened to what all was out there. I began to respect religion in so many ways.

If there is a god, then I think my feelings towards him/her right now would be much respect. I’m sure it must have taken a lot of effort to make such a large and intricate universe, down to every speck.

I see every religion has a point. A system. And if each religion says it’s right, then which is right? It’s hard to imagine that there’s only one right answer, leaving the rest of the ancient religious systems wrong.

The truth can be quite tricky a lot of times, tangled up in a ball of invisible truth yarn.

Judaism. Buddhism. Sikhism. Hinduism. Islam. Christianity.

Who’s to say which is the true one?

I used to say that there’s just too many religions, and that I didn’t believe in any particular one. I go on with my life.

It worked while I was young, carefree, and somewhat ignorant of everything.

My Evolution

My perspective changed when I was faced with a question of – how do we raise children with regards to religion?

Today, I believe in every single one. I believe in the values they create within each person. All religion teaches the importance of values.

I admire that religion gives one such strength to get through difficult life ordeals. That it brings a family, a community together. Its ideals are to strengthen the resolve to be the best person you are. I studied a little on every major religion, and all I saw were good things.

Through travels, I have had many wonderful opportunities to meet with people around the world with their own unique religious beliefs. I love talking to people about their religion, especially those who devote their entire lives to one.

I don’t believe in demeaning other people, like what happened to me today. The conversation had baffled me, making me feel as if I needed to be saved or leaving me feeling like I’m not good enough.

I think religions are great, especially if they are interpreted well and foster actions and feelings of:

Spirituality and mindfulness – be in the now and appreciate all else around them
Way of living – cause no harm to others
Values and Integrity – teaching honesty, work ethics, cooperation, punctuality
Responsibility – be a good person to a family, a community
Give strength – to get one through hard times

I have a lot of respect towards religion bringing people to different countries of the world to bring love and care to those who don’t have enough.

People could be in their own bubble, but they chose to spend time and money to take care of others.

So to those who says I will “go to hell” or that I needed saving and “pray that the Lord will lead you the right way,” I say- Thanks, it would be cool to see God, but if I don’t, then I will learn from the lessons he teaches through his religion. God is a part of us all, isn’t he?

Thanks for tuning into my little segment on religion! What did you think? Have you encountered anything similar?

On a different note, here are some less controversial topics I’ve written about recently:

I remember arriving in the Atlanta International Airport after a 24+ hours long flight (with a canceled flight night in Seoul, Korea- an adventure I will write about next time).

In three words, it was: quiet, cold, and lonely. Where were the loud honkings? Where were the street vendors on every corner? The dozens of people trying to sell you tropical fruits? The motorbikes? I distinctly remember all those things being really annoying and obnoxious, but without it, I suddenly feel empty.

Reverse culture shock is a real thing. When I went home, all the trees were bare, the house was empty. The neighbors stuck to themselves. It was like I had never left.

I missed Vietnam a lot. I still miss Vietnam, and fondly remember all the people I’ve met and cherished. On this quiet night in a mountains of North Carolina, I want to dedicate a post on what I really wished I had right now.

Noise, Noise, Noise!!!

The grinch would have hated Vietnam. To properly pinpoint a specific noise is a difficult task since there are so many contributors to it. People. Motorbikes. Music. Cars. Honking. Dogs. Roosters (and their roosting). Cows. Cats. Machinery. Trucks. Boats. Noise is everywhere (unless you live in a really mountainous town or tiny village).

Yes, I realize I’m listing the 10 reasons why I didn’t want to leave Vietnam. However, I strongly feel that the cons were Vietnam’s pros. So hear me out.

Perhaps one of the most memorable traits of Vietnam is that 80% of vehicles on the roads are motorbikes. And 99% of the time, they are honking. I understand it’s something that could give someone deep migraines as a newcomer, but after awhile, I learned started to find it quite practical. See, with technically no constant enforced laws on the roads, motorbiking around will look reckless and dangerous.

Honking is a constant form of communication between drivers of automobiles and motorbikes. It’s a way of saying, “Hey! I’m here, just a quick reminder…”

Crowded

I miss being able to jump on a motorbike and go pretty much anywhere. Being on the road in Vietnam is like playing MarioKart in real life. Sure, there are pot holes on the roads and no room to ride between all the legit motorbike riders out there, but it’s the thrill of being in the open and riding next to your family members.

Haggling in the markets is a culture trait I despise taking part of while in Vietnam. However, I can’t deny that the markets would not be the same without the loud, and oftentimes intimidating, bartering back and forth. There is a beauty in it, once you listen for awhile. If you listen even longer and not afraid of being embarrassed, you could barter just like a local.

Dirt. Cheap. Food.

Vietnam is definitely in my favor as a vegetarian. The country is 70% Buddhist and vegetarian meat substitute are abundant and have stellar quality.

Not only that, I could get one big bowl of quality vegetarian stirfry noodles or pho (noodle soup) for less than $1!!

Kilos of tropical fruits with value of over $10 could be bought for $2. In my many posts in the past, I have divulge that I’m a huge fan of good cheap street food. Only in traveling to other countries do I get a chance to try delicious cheap street food (unlike the $5 for a tiny serving street food in New York).

Landscape

With three main regions in the long “S” shape strip of a country, Vietnam has everything to offer. It has beautiful islands, lovely ancient cities, famous plantations, undiscovered caves, and beautiful mountains.

Some of my favorite sightseeing moments are driving by rice fields and looking at dilapidated houses.

http://www.iwinta.com/2018/01/16/vietnam-hiking-ba-ho-nha-trang/

A picture speaks more than a thousand words. Need I say more?

Cheap Everything Else

Overnight buses cost $5-$10. Compared to overnight buses to New York, Vietnam buses are heavenly. Nice 3-4 star quality hotels costs range from $10-$20 a night!

Motorbiking

I’m addicted to being on the road. Cuong and I would often argue over who gets to drive first. We were like kids riding a bicycle.

Vietnam Transportation: To Motorbike or Not?

(I can’t believe I’m including this, but…. ) Soccer/Football

Soccer/Football, the one you play with your feet, is a huge deal in Asia. While we were in Vietnam, we were in the midst of a U23 international soccer competition. Vietnam supporters were very passionate about our country making it to the almost-top. I’ve never been a sports fan in my life, but I have found soccer to be the easiest to understand.

When the time and day arrives, all of Vietnam’s eyes were on the TV, no matter where they are. It’s amazing how even the people with the biggest differences all sit down and watch the same thing, cheer for the same things. If there’s anything I found out from soccer games, it’s that the Vietnamese are united and proud, not of the communist government, the the people and the country itself.

When Vietnam won the semi-final match, we all stormed the streets. Hundreds and thousands of people took their motorbike and rode through town with the flags in the air. “VIETNAM UNDEFEATED!!!” they chanted.

Enjoy Tet Celebration in Its Entirety

Something I got to do differently this year was take part in the searching and buying of flowers. We had a seven foot tall lime tree sitting in the back of our motorbike while one person drives and one person holds it up. The vase took 5 people to carry, and was huge! When in Rome, am I right?

Another favorite new experience of mine is cooking the traditional Banh Tet! We spent over 7 hours cooking outside with wood fire to completely cook a giant pot of banh tet. I wrote about the entire experience here!

Vietnam: Making Traditional Banh Tet for Lunar New Year!

Family and Communities

When my parents fled Vietnam in the 1990s, they had left behind their entire family. We’ve been back as a family a total of 3 times in 20+ years. I did not meet my extended family until I was a teenager. When I came back, I feel like a part of me was missing, because, well… they’re like family to me. Now, whenever I have problems with my parents, I can’t come running to my aunts for safehaven or advice anymore. Now, I have to deal with my issues like the adult that I am. /sigh.

See, Vietnamese people have a very special and close-knit bond with each other. Families live near one another and children often live with their parents in their old age. Neighbors come to one another’s house to play board games, eat, cook, party, and especially gossip on a day to day basis.

Way of Life

Vietnam is so different from the United States in so many different ways. Some for the better, and some for the worse. Cuong and I often mention how we were able to freely make decision in Vietnam.

Children wander around on their blocks and ride their bikes out to the beach (up to 3 miles from home).

We like living a minimalist lifestyle.

Vietnam is truly beauty in chaos. It’s hectic, it’s loud, it’s dirty, but it’s endearing. I’ve never felt so much at home. I understand everyone and everything, and can feel where my roots are.

Month: April 2018

On Religion: “You know what… I’ll pray for you”