happiness – Winta Solstice

… was what I was told as soon as she knew that I wasn’t religious. “Huh,” I thought.

It seems like a really nice and considerate statement, but then it had seems somewhat closed and short. Like the topic was over. It had bothered me.

You know what? I’ll pray for you, and that the lord will find you and lead you to a better place.

Wasn’t that statement a little passive aggressive?

Religion and I

Since little, my parents had given me a strict set of guidelines of things I can and can’t do, must and mustn’t do via religion. I was told to sit in a meditation posture and pray, without really knowing what it does.

It turns out, I was supposed to see my “master” in my inner conscience. If we pray and meditate a lot, with enough focus, we would be able to see her. I suppose it is similar to Jesus or Allah appearing in your thoughts when you ask for help.

My family’s religion, The Quan Yin Method, developed by the Supreme Ching Hai, is similar to Buddhism. Raised with this religion, I was vegetarian all my life. I meditated for most of my childhood, not knowing what I was doing. I was told to chant my “master’s” name before I slept so that I would be blessed. If I did everything right, I would see her in my inner thoughts.

Well, hard as I tried, I never saw her.

I felt like I was doing something wrong. Like I wasn’t good enough. How come everyone else seems to be on the right path, but I couldn’t see it?

Doubts, Questions, and Insecurities

As a child I was really confused, but I was scared of asking for fear of adults scolding me. I was also scared of being slow and that everyone would know that I’m too shallow to understand the depths of my master’s teachings.

I felt like I was just sitting there, waiting an eternity for the 30 minutes to end so I could go eat and play.

When we lived in the Philippines, Christianity was the dominant religion. I didn’t participate in Bible study, so I had a lot of time to myself while my friends hung out and talked about Christ.

I enjoyed reading stories about Christ. How God created the world. The story of Adam and Eve. The three kings and baby Jesus. Christmas was also my favorite holiday!

Then, I was also conscious of Buddhism, from books and TV shows, there were lots of fun lessons to learn. Buddhism taught me the importance to question everything. I needed to be conscious of my way of living.

If I want to throw fire at someone, my hand would be burnt first.

The more people I meet, the more my mind opened to what all was out there. I began to respect religion in so many ways.

If there is a god, then I think my feelings towards him/her right now would be much respect. I’m sure it must have taken a lot of effort to make such a large and intricate universe, down to every speck.

I see every religion has a point. A system. And if each religion says it’s right, then which is right? It’s hard to imagine that there’s only one right answer, leaving the rest of the ancient religious systems wrong.

The truth can be quite tricky a lot of times, tangled up in a ball of invisible truth yarn.

Judaism. Buddhism. Sikhism. Hinduism. Islam. Christianity.

Who’s to say which is the true one?

I used to say that there’s just too many religions, and that I didn’t believe in any particular one. I go on with my life.

It worked while I was young, carefree, and somewhat ignorant of everything.

My Evolution

My perspective changed when I was faced with a question of – how do we raise children with regards to religion?

Today, I believe in every single one. I believe in the values they create within each person. All religion teaches the importance of values.

I admire that religion gives one such strength to get through difficult life ordeals. That it brings a family, a community together. Its ideals are to strengthen the resolve to be the best person you are. I studied a little on every major religion, and all I saw were good things.

Through travels, I have had many wonderful opportunities to meet with people around the world with their own unique religious beliefs. I love talking to people about their religion, especially those who devote their entire lives to one.

I don’t believe in demeaning other people, like what happened to me today. The conversation had baffled me, making me feel as if I needed to be saved or leaving me feeling like I’m not good enough.

I think religions are great, especially if they are interpreted well and foster actions and feelings of:

Spirituality and mindfulness – be in the now and appreciate all else around them
Way of living – cause no harm to others
Values and Integrity – teaching honesty, work ethics, cooperation, punctuality
Responsibility – be a good person to a family, a community
Give strength – to get one through hard times

I have a lot of respect towards religion bringing people to different countries of the world to bring love and care to those who don’t have enough.

People could be in their own bubble, but they chose to spend time and money to take care of others.

So to those who says I will “go to hell” or that I needed saving and “pray that the Lord will lead you the right way,” I say- Thanks, it would be cool to see God, but if I don’t, then I will learn from the lessons he teaches through his religion. God is a part of us all, isn’t he?

Thanks for tuning into my little segment on religion! What did you think? Have you encountered anything similar?

On a different note, here are some less controversial topics I’ve written about recently:

Hi, everyone!! Today, I’d like to share one of the best books I’ve read this year. The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz is essentially a book of conducts that can transform our lives to a new experience of freedom, happiness, and love. It eliminates needless suffering and self destructive thoughts through simple agreements. With only a little over 100 pages, this book is packed with deep revelations and logical reasoning.

I should first mention that I’m not a huge fan of self-help books. I’ve always felt that reading it meant that I needed help and I have to follow what some author decided was best. Of course, my views has changed over the years. This book, in particular, has changed my entire perspective and way of life in the most fundamental ways.

I first heard of The Four Agreements from Cuong about two years ago. The book had seemed interesting, and I added it to my to-read list. I encountered it again when we visited in a perma-culture farm in El Salvador where a group people lived by the principles of this book. It wasn’t until recently that I had the chance to read it.

The book is based on the philosophy of the Toltec, an ancient tribe of men and women with immense knowledge. According to Ruiz, humans have domesticated to believe everything they have been told. Because each core belief, or agreement, reflects whoever passes on that agreement and may have a detrimental effect in your lifetime.

Check out The Four Agreements on Amazon here!

What are these four magical agreements?

Be impeccable with your word. Stresses the importance of the words you use, and how it affects on you and others. I believe this is the most important agreement of them all. We should never make empty promises, say things we don’t mean, or gossip about others. There is no use for them, as it decreases our own credibility and hurt other people.

Don’t take anything personally. Too often, we’ve let ourselves get hurt by people’s word and actions. We become depressed or take revenge. We become belligerent or passive aggressive towards people. If we keep a clear head by not taking anything personally, then we will be able to learn much more from life.

Don’t make assumptions. Like it or not, our assumptions causes a lot of misunderstanding and fights. Assumptions cause disappointments, hurt, and unfair expectations. It stresses the importance of transparency in communication.

Always do your best. Ruiz acknowledges that some days aren’t good as others, and that’s okay. However, one must always put their honest hardest efforts into the work they do so that they don’t regret it later on. As long as we all are able to stand behind the work that we do, then there is nothing to be upset about.

The Four Agreement, written in 2005, was supposed to be a standalone book, containing all the agreements needed to master ourselves. It has been quite successful and well-liked by many readers. In 2010, Ruiz wrote another book, The Fifth Agreement, which is basically a summary of the first book with some added sugar, which I thought was kind of a strategy to milk the money. But since I haven’t read it, I can’t say much.

As with many self-improvement books, the chapters in The Four Agreements felt somewhat redundant. Regardless, the message passed on by Ruiz is powerful and worth reading. I finished the book in a couple of days and have been improving my way of life since. It taught me the core foundations it takes to be a happy individual. Ever since reading it, I’ve become more conscious about not partaking in gossip. I’ve also become a more impeccable speaker, saying only things that I mean and keeping to my word.

Each chapter is built upon the previous one, The Four Agreements guides us towards true realization of how important it is to follow these. It’s amazing how ancient Toltec philosophy remains relevant with today world. Sometimes the most elegant solution to a problem is the simplest one. I enjoyed reading Ruiz’s take on self-improvement, and will make an agreement with myself to re-read this book again in the future.

A Response to Daily Prompt: Better

Thanks for reading!!! I’m always searching for book recommendations. Have you read this book/similar books? Please leave your thoughts in comments or shoot me an email! <3

Tag: happiness

On Religion: “You know what… I’ll pray for you”